“To take a new direction, we must let go of an old one.” - Steven C. Hayes
We are going to work collaboratively on clarifying what new direction you want to take, and how to best get there. Along the way, we might discover new places you’d like to go, or areas we need to sit and park at for a while. Throughout the process, we’ll stay in communication to make sure the work feels purposeful and aligned with your goals.
What to expect in therapy with me:
I’m an active, collaborative therapist, and I tend to be fairly directive. I see therapy as something we do together: you bring the content of your life, and I bring curiosity, clinical structure, and tools for helping us understand what may be keeping you stuck.
We’ll start with what you notice now. What feels difficult? What keeps repeating? What seems disproportionate? What do you wish were different? Sometimes people come in with a very clear goal. Other times, part of the work is figuring out what they want and why that has been hard to name.
I often think of the process a little like detective work. We’re not just asking what is happening, but what is holding it in place, what function the pattern may have served, and what would need to change for something different to become possible.
Together, we’ll build a map.
Once we have a sense of what you want to be different, we’ll start building a working map of the pattern. We may look at thoughts, emotions, behaviors, relationships, body-based responses, and earlier experiences that seem connected to what is happening now.
That map is not meant to be a final explanation of you. It is more like a working hypothesis: our best understanding of what seems to be driving the pattern and why it has been difficult to change on your own.
From there, we can decide together what to target first, try an approach that fits what we are seeing, and keep paying attention to whether it is actually helping.
And we’ll make sure we’ve got enough gas for the journey.
Change is easier when there is something adaptive to move toward. Part of our work may involve building internal and external resources, strengthening skills, and helping you access experiences that support the way you want to respond.
That might include developing greater capacity for grounding, self-trust, connection, boundaries, emotional regulation, or values-aligned action. We can also identify moments when those responses are already available and strengthen those experiences so they become easier for your brain and body to access again.
The goal is not only to loosen an old pattern, but to build a stronger network of responses, relationships, and resources that can support something different in its place.
There will be different tools we use along the way.
I draw from several evidence-based and process-based approaches. We won’t choose a modality simply because it is one I use; we’ll choose tools based on what seems to be maintaining the pattern and what kind of change we are trying to create.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
ACT is a flexible, evidence-based approach that helps people respond differently to difficult thoughts and emotions while moving toward what matters most. It can be especially useful for anxiety, stress, decision-making, relationship patterns, and building a life that feels more aligned with your values.
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)
EMDR is an evidence-based approach that helps people process distressing experiences and reduce the intensity of emotional, cognitive, and physiological responses that continue to feel active in the present. It can be useful when past experiences still shape how you feel, react, or relate today.
Deep Brain Reorienting (DBR)
DBR is a newer therapeutic approach that works with the brain and body’s earliest orienting responses to emotionally significant experiences. It can be especially useful when reactions feel automatic, deeply rooted, or difficult to access through words alone, and when the body seems to respond before the mind can catch up.
Positive Psychology
Positive Psychology helps us strengthen what you want more of in your life: connection, meaning, engagement, strengths, and experiences that support wellbeing. It can be especially useful when we are building adaptive resources and making desired responses easier to access and repeat.
And we’ll stay focused, but flexible as we journey along.
Therapy doesn’t have to follow the same format from from beginning to end. We may get started with 60 minute, individual sessions as you clarify your goals and we begin exploring patterns. Then, depending on what we’re working towards, we might adjust the structure by changing the frequency or duration of the sessions. Or, we may decide that collaborating with family members will best support your goals and we’ll invite members in. Ways our work might be structured:
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Regular one-on-one therapy, often weekly or at a rhythm that fits the current phase of treatment.
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Longer sessions, from 90 minutes up to three hours when we want more uninterrupted time for focused EMDR, DBR, or other experiential work.
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A more concentrated series of sessions around a specific target, followed by time to integrate and reassess.
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When individual patterns are closely tied to family dynamics, especially in work involving adolescents, we may include parent consultation or family-focused sessions as part of the treatment plan.
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For clients who are able to meet in Hawai’i, more concentrated in-person work may be an option.
